i don’t think anyone has quite realized just what the doctor did when he closed the doors on amy. it wasn’t just forcing rory to choose, forcing amy to choose - it was him being selfish as much as it was him being selfless. he wanted his amy. his pond. his amelia. not the amy on the other side of the doors, who was old and wise and angry and understood him. and hated him - almost as much as he hates himself. that amy had years to consider just what the doctor had done to her life. and he chose to run away from that; he didn’t want the consequences. he looked at the amy who had lost melody, rory, and ultimately herself and ran away. because if he took the younger amy, the less damaged amy, maybe he’d have a second chance to make it right. i think that’s all the doctor wants to do - make amy’s life right. give her back her daughter, let her just be married, and be herself, and not have her life ruined while travelling with him. however, he’s also a lonely, lonely man, and the ponds make the universe a little less empty for him. but he’ll hate himself for every minute he thinks he’s stealing from their lives. he doesn’t understand that he’s worthy of the people who love him.